Oh life. That beautiful thing that we all have. Life really is beautiful. We have so many amazing experiances in life, to go along with and hopefully cancel out the bad ones. But there is one consequence of this terribly beautiful life. That's decisions. I dread making them. I'm so scared of stepping out of the will of God that it nearly immobilizes me. This, I'm certain is the greatest way of me living out of the will of God- that is, doing nothing.
I've come to a crossroad in my life. This cannot merely be equated to a fork in the road. I picture myself standing at a point with about fifteen roads sprouting off from where my feet are. My only option is to make a choice. I have no idea what choice to make. I have application filled out for Elim and I'm filling one out for World Harvest. I canot start till January, though, due to family issues. I could also go back into YWAM for the simple fact that it's easier. I have other options around here as well. So many choices and only one life to live.
With all these choices about my future, of course my head is spinning. Add on top of that a social life including members of both sexes and trying to find my father. Does it seem strange to anyone that I'm a bit stressed and freaked out?
It's so difficult to sit and quiet my mind, waiting on the the Lord to tell me what to do next. I'm going crazy! I don't want to dissapoint anyone, esspecially God, yet I know that whatever I do, He'll still love me and have His hand in it. I just want to live up to my full potential. Is that so wrong?
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